Don’t Mind The Gap
Posted by Chen on / 0 Comments
We like art at our house. Not in a portentous sort of “look at all our expensive paintings” kinda way (I mean we have young children… we can’t have nice things), But in an everybody is always doing something creative kinda way. At any given moment at our house, you will find someone writing a song, someone painting, someone building entire cities of legos, someone playing drums, or someone constructing a full body iron man costume, from discarded Amazon boxes.
Despite all that, it still took me by surprise when my son experienced his first creative crisis. The other day he was sitting at his desk drawing, and all of a sudden he threw his hand up in the air, pushed himself away from the desk and walked away. When I asked him what was wrong, he said: “all my ideas backfire or turn against me.”
Boom. Out of the mouths of babes.
I know that feeling. You know that feeling. It is an unavoidable part of artistic pursuits. I’ve heard it explained before as The Gap (No, not the store in the mall where you go once a year for Christmas shopping, even though you could get something just as good at target for half the price).
When you first start out practicing your chosen artistic discipline, your taste or your instinct is usually further along then your actual skill level. And so you end up being unsatisfied with the results of your work because you lack the skills to accurately manifest your ideas.
That way of explaining it implies that over time your skill level will catch up to your vision, and all will be right with the world.
But guess what? That’s not what happens. All those memes you’ve seen online inspiring you to practice so that you can close that gap are wrong. Because you see, as your skill level grows so does the scope and complexity of your ideas, and as a result, the gap remains.
I didn’t tell my son that. I mean, that’s depressing. “Sorry son, you can spend a lifetime honing your skills, but you will most likely never be satisfied, and always want more.” No, I’m pretty sure that is not the best way to encourage artistic growth in an 8-year-old. That information is more of a “need to know” kinda thing, and well, at this point he doesn’t need to know. You, however, my dear reader, do need to know.
So now that you do know, now that I’ve dashed your hopes that one day you might experience pure everlasting artistic satisfaction, and that there is a finish line to the rigorous pursuit of artistic excellence, what do you do about it? How can you bridge an ever-widening gap, and how will you ever be happy again?!
Well, the trick is not to try and get rid of the gap, but instead to change the way we relate to it.
The gap is not a negative byproduct of trying and failing, it’s a positive catalyst for learning and growth.
The gap is the single greatest driving force that pushes us to better our selfs. The scope of our ideas grows BECAUSE we search for ways to enhance our skills and close the gap. Once we start thinking of it like this, we can start making peace with it. Instead of looking at where we want to be and lamenting that we are not there, we look at where we are and get excited about the opportunities to improve that lay ahead.
So why didn’t I tell my son that? Why is this not “need to know” info for him? Why Am I ok with him experiencing the futile struggle of trying to bridge the gap?
Well, because at first, trying to bridge the gap is how we learn to improve. We need a goal when we start. A carrot, something to shoot for. We are not quite ready to concern our selves with the higher mysteries of the creative journey, so we must immerse our selves in pursuit of technical skills. This can be tiresome and repetitive, and so having a goal to shoot for helps in keeping us motivated, and stimulates growth. The hope is that through this stage of our growth we will develop a love for the process of improving our skills, and gain satisfaction not just by reaching our goals, but by pursuing them as well.
This is difficult for most people because of, well, ego. We want to feel accomplished. We want to pat our selves on the back. We want a resolution to the tension of ‘trying.’
But getting that resolution, reaching that finish line, being comfortable, is the end of growth. My old guitar teacher used to say: practicing what you know is a nice ego boost, but practicing what you suck at is how you get better.
To quote another inspirational meme; we must get comfortable being uncomfortable. The gap is uncomfortable. That’s how it drives us. Being unsatisfied with the status quo is what pushes us to try to change it. When we understand this, our relationship with art changes. It becomes about the journey, not the destination (look at that, another inspirational quote), and we start to understand that the true masters of any discipline, do not seek to master it, but instead seek to become a dedicated lifelong student of it.
And so for now, my son will try to bridge the gap by practicing his skill, and in time it will not be the reaching of his goals that will matter, but the process of getting there that will define him.
So get comfortable being uncomfortable, don’t mind the gap, and learn how to write a song.
Award winning and multi platinum selling songwriter/producer Chen Neeman's songs have been recorded by artists such as Miley Cyrus, Demi Lovato, Selena Gomez, Joe Jonas, Zendaya, and The Muppets, among others. Chen is dedicated to helping aspiring songwriters learn how to write better songs through personalized one-on-one coaching sessions via Skype, FaceTime, or in person at his L.A Studio.
Find out more about Chen’s Pro Songwriting Coaching, at HitSongCoach.com